1. Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk
>>> ahead of me,
>>> > for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just
>>> pretty much
>>> > leave me the hell alone.
>>> >
>>> > 2. The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan
>>> belt or
>>> > leaky tire.
>>> >
>>> > 3. It's always darkest before dawn. So if you're going to
>>> steal your
>>> > neighbor's newspaper, that's the time to do it.
>>> >
>>> > 4. Don't be irreplaceable. If you can't be replaced, you can't
>>> be
>>> > promoted.
>>> >
>>> > 5. Always remember that you're unique. Just like everyone
>&g t;> else.
>>> >
>>> > 6. Never test the depth of the water with both feet.
>>> >
>>> > 7. If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a
>>> couple of
>>> > car payments.
>>> >
>>> > 8. Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in
>>> their shoes.
>>> > That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you
>>> have their
>>> > shoes.
>>> >
>>> > 9. If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you.
>>> >
>>> > 10. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how
>>> to fish,
>>> > and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.
>>> >
>>> > 11. If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again,
>>> it was
>>> > probabl y worth it.
>>> >
>>> > 12. If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember
>>> anything.
>>> >
>>> > 13. Some days you're the bug; some days you're the windshield.
>>> >
>>> > 14. Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.
>>> >
>>> > 15. The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in
>>> half and put
>>> > it back in your pocket.
>>> >
>>> > 16. A closed mouth gathers no foot.
>>> >
>>> > 17. Duct tape is like 'The Force'. It has a light side and a
>>> dark side,
>>> > and it holds the universe together.
>>> >
>>> > 18. There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one
>>> works.
>>> >
>>> > 19. Generally speaking, you aren't learning much whe n your
>>> lips are
>>> > moving.
>>> >
>>> > 20. Experience is something you don't get until just after you
>>> need it.
>>> >
>>> > 21. Never miss a good chance to shut up.
>>> >
>>> > 22. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a
>>> laxative
>>> > on the same night
>>>
>>>
>>>