NUDITY
"I was driving with my three young children one warm summer day when a woman
in a convertable ahead of me, stood up and waved. She was stark naked! As I
was reeling from the shock, I heard my five-year old shout from the back

seat, "Look mom, that lady isn't wearing a seat belt."
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HONESTY
"My four-year old son came screaming out of the bathroom to tell me that he

had dropped his tooth brush into the toilet. I went into the bathroom,
fished it out and threw it into the garbage.
He then ran into my bathroom, grabbed my tooth brush and said, "Mom, you
better throw this in the garbage too, cause I dropped it in the toilet

yesterday."
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OPINIONS
On the first day of school, a first-grader handed his teacher a note from <>his mother. The note read, "The opinions expressed by this child are not

necessarily those of his parents."
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KETCHUP
A woman was banging the bottom of the ketchup trying to loosen up the
contents.. During the struggle the phone rang so she asked her four-year old

daughter to answer it. "Its the minister mommy."
She then said to the minister, "I'm sorry but mommy can't come to the phone
right now, she's hitting the bottle."
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MORE NUDITY
A little boy was with his mother at the YWCA and got lost. Somehow he found
himself in the women's locker room. When he was spotted, the room burst into
shieks with the women grabbing towels or anything else they could to cover
themselves. The little boy watched with amazement and then asked, "What's the
matter, haven't you ever seen a little boy before?"
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ELDERLY
"When working for the organization, "Meals on Wheels," I used to take my
four-year old daughter on the afternoon rounds. For some reason, appliances such
as canes, walkers and wheelchairs seemed to fascinate her. One day I saw her

staring at a pair of false teeth in a glass. As I braced myself for the
inevitable question, she merely turned to me and whispered, "The tooth fairy will
NEVER believe this!"
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DEATH
While walking along the sidewalk, a priest heard, coming from the other
side of a fence, the intoning of a prayer that almost made his collar wilt.
Apparently a five -year old girl and some of her friends found a dead turtle and

decided to give it a formal funeral. They put the turtle in a small box, and
dug a hole. One little girl was elected to give the final prayer before the
grave was covered. She began, "Glory be to the Father, to the Son and into the

hole he goes."
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SCHOOL
A little girl had just finished her first week of school and seemed
depressed. Her mother asked her what the problem was and she replied, "I can't read,

I can't write and they won't let me talk."
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THE BIBLE
A little boy opened the family's large Bible and was fascinated as he
fingered through the many pages. When he was about halfway through, he came across

a large leaf that someone had pressed between the pages. He then called to
his mother, "Look w hat I found mom! I think it's Adam's underwear!"
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